Be generous with praise. Be cautious with criticisms. Be honest with both.

Tell people when they’ve done a good job. We don’t do it enough. Sometimes we are too critical, or expect too much. Sometimes we just assume that the person knows that they’re doing well. And sometimes, we just forget. But it is important to brag on a job well done. Criticism, on the other hand, is dangerous. It can be necessary, at times. But over doing it can damage a relationship, or worse destroy it. When I was working as a classroom teacher, I learned firsthand the power of positive reinforcement. And it makes perfect sense, because we all love to hear that we’re doing a good job. But, I was far from the perfect teacher, and needed guidance from time to time. The principal I worked for would often model what he called “the Oreo method” for criticism. He would surround a piece of criticism with two bits of praise. Like cream in an Oreo. For example, “Great game today, Teddy. Strong moves in the post and you shot the ball well. I need you to work on you passing a little, though. Especially in transition. But I don’t think you missed a free throw today, and that is exceptional. Good job, pal!” We have praised the effort, spotlighted specific things that were great and still shown a spotlight on the issue that needs addressing. The most important thing through all of this is honesty. Don’t lavish someone with faint praise or become hypercritical and nitpick every detail. Brag on folks in a way that they know what your saying is honest and true. It will do wonders for the both of you.